Deconstruction or Destruction?
When Questioning Becomes Quitting
Everyone's deconstructing these days, and I get it.
What Needs to Be Torn Down
- Purity culture traumatized an entire generation
- The American church mixed nationalism with the gospel and called it Christianity
- We were told to never question, never doubt
- If we struggled, we just needed "more faith"
- LGBTQ+ people were excluded and condemned
- Women were silenced
- Abuse was covered up
So now, people are walking away. And honestly? Some of it needed to be torn down.
But Here's Where I'm Stuck
When does deconstruction become destruction?
I'm watching people deconstruct their way right out of faith entirely.
They started by questioning bad theology—which is healthy—but ended by rejecting Jesus altogether. They threw out the bathwater and the baby.
The Pattern I'm Seeing
- Question purity culture → ✅ Good
- Question nationalism → ✅ Good
- Question toxic leadership → ✅ Good
- Question biblical authority → ⚠️ Careful
- Question Jesus Himself → ❌ Wrong turn
What Healthy Deconstruction Looks Like
Deconstruction should lead you closer to the real Jesus, not further away.
It's about removing the layers of religious baggage we've added to the gospel, not dismantling the gospel itself.
Question Everything... Except
Question:
- The political Jesus
- The prosperity Jesus
- The Western, white, American Jesus
- The judgmental Jesus
- The religious Jesus
But don't lose:
- The actual Jesus—the one who:
- Ate with sinners (Luke 15:1-2)
- Touched lepers (Mark 1:40-42)
- Challenged religious leaders (Matthew 23)
- Elevated women (John 4)
- Chose death over compromise (Philippians 2:8)
My Own Deconstruction
I've had to deconstruct too. I've had to unlearn toxic teachings about:
- Women in ministry
- Grace vs. works
- Who gets to be included in God's love
- What "biblical womanhood" actually means
- How to read the Old Testament
But I didn't deconstruct my way out of faith. I deconstructed my way into a healthier, more honest faith.
The Difference
| Healthy Deconstruction | Unhealthy Destruction |
|---|---|
| Questions the church | Questions Christ |
| Removes man-made rules | Removes biblical truth |
| Deepens faith | Abandons faith |
| Leads to freedom | Leads to cynicism |
Two Different Failures
There's a difference between rejecting bad religion and rejecting God. One is necessary. The other is tragic.
"They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us; but their going showed that none of them belonged to us." — 1 John 2:19
But Also...
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." — Matthew 11:28
Jesus isn't afraid of your questions. The religious leaders were. Don't confuse the two.
Keep Questioning
If you're in a season of questioning, keep going:
- Ask the hard questions
- Challenge what you've been taught
- Test everything (1 Thessalonians 5:21)
- Wrestle with God like Jacob
But don't mistake the failure of the church for the failure of Christ.
Jesus can handle your deconstruction. He's probably been waiting for it.
